Friday, November 6, 2009

Why girls don't go army (part 2)

Men are blessed with a physique which is meant to be imposing, tough and strong. Therefore, I think this is the #2 reason why men are called to do national service. This definitely make sense. In the olden days, armours don't only act as a body shield, they also give the solider a manipulative figure, with their ridiculously broad shoulders, tall height etc.

2) Physical Physique. Everyone knows a fearsome and competent soldier needs to carry an imposing image, one that would strike fear into people. After all, we all heard of deterrence military? We don't really fight, but we do 'show' what we are capable of! Although I have seen my fair share of girls who are more than capable of doing what the guys do in army, I would still believe that to obtain a big group of people who are capable of carrying out the physically demanding duties, the men are the best choice!

The two physical activities we are all too familiar with are the SOC and IPPT! While IPPT test the soldier's fitness level, the SOC test the soldier's combat fitness. If you have been to the recruit's enlistment day @ Tekong Resort, you would have noticed the obstacle course. You might think it is easy, because you think they looked like monkey bars and things guys LOVE to do., but it is far from being easy.

1)The obstacles are not as easy as it looks. The bars on the monkey bar are further apart from one another, and in such random arrangement. The balancing log isn't as easy because your panting does not assist your balancing act. The height of our jumps and climbs can be terrifying for those who have a phobia for heights!

2) We do a 1.5km run along with the obstacles. Children run to hang around at the playground with a distance less than 100m, while we actually run 1.5km!! Mind you, this isn't like how we chase the bus at bus stops( only in jeans and tee)! We wear helmet, our 'Armour' and our rifle! If the word 'Ouch' comes to mind, you are right!

3) The third fact, which is the most interesting and fun fact is that if you fail to meet the timing, you got to do it ALL OVER AGAIN, on a separate day! Yes, the laundry, the smell, the fatigue, all over again!

Now, it is almost impossible for so many girls to clear this kind of obstacle course. The muscle and bone structures of women are just not meant to do these physical activities. If you have went through National Service, you would have known about all the horrifying injuries related to the obstacle course. Now fast forward and ask yourself in the shoe of a father, would you bear your daughter to suffer such injuries? If it is severe, how do you plan to marry her off?

Women in our generation are known to be really pampered. Gone are the days where regardless of your sex, you are at the farm plowing and doing work! Nowadays, it is so common to see men carry the girl's handbag! So don't complain that girls are not in army. Of course, unless you are willing to carry their rifles during SOC, and their field pack during road march? You choose! :P

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Key to problem solving: No UPSIZE!

I had this inspiration while talking to a friend few days ago when this friend shared with me some difficulties this friend is having! Would you not agree that when we do think of the problems and difficulties that need our immediate attention, they seem very 'big' and almost impossible to resolve? Have you felt that way?

I used to do track and field in the sprints department, and people keep saying life is like a marathon... A long distance race! I actually disagree. I think it is like steeplechase! There will be times when you are thrown with a problem, a hurdle and you need to find a solution to overcome and jump over it! Tiring? yes. Boring? yes. Depressing? Sometimes. I quote my friend: No life is a bed of roses. none.

Imagine an emotional teenager's stressed out mind:

I just completed my exams and I don't think I did a good job. I am worried for my results. I'm going to enlist to NS in 1 month(there goes my freedom), and I still owe someone money for the soccer bets i gambled on last month. I'm also worried my girlfriend will love an ORD personnel more than a soldier. My best friend is too busy with his Christmas plans because he enlist in April to even hear me out. My dad just got into a fight with my mum and I was like a messenger during breakfast. To make things worse, the bus uncle drove the bus off when I just reached the bus stop just now on the way here.

Okay, this kind of statement would probably have played in your mind before, or you have heard someone tell/whine to you in this manner before. Even when you read it, you would actually think that is really a lot of things that this fellow is going through. I realised the key to minimize the issues is to break it down. Try it out! If we break down the above mentioned, there are actually only FOUR substantial 'problems' he is in right now:

1)I'm worried for my exams.( What is done is done, and it is over. There really isn't anything you can do other than to pray)
2)I owe someone money.( This is actually the only issue that he needs to focus on at this point of time)
3) girlfriend loving an ORD personnel more than me.( You are in no position to dictate who she meets, who she likes, who she go out with. Speaking of losing a girlfriend in NS, you can always look for me, haha)
4)Parents got into a fight.(I personally think there isn't much a child can do when their parents fight, but to be a good child. Show them you are a good filial child, and them fighting for the marriage will be worth it)

I really don't know if it is your mind or your eyes, but when you see the whole issue broken down into point form, it really isn't as 'big' as it seemed to be! The other thing I realised is that when you have problems, every small thing that is NOT going YOUR WAY will become a a new problem! That is why the statement mentioned included a)the bus b)Best friend going for holiday. These things just happen to be unfortunate due to the coincidental clash of timings.

Breaking down your problems into point form next time will probably help you realise that things are not as bad as it seemed to be. Being an economics student, breaking down your issues will also assist you with one of the most important component of economics of scale: Division of FOCUS! Take a deep breath, free your mind and write down your problems into point form, and focus on those that is really actually affecting you!

*Disclaimer: if the above quoted story is related to any person in reality or fiction is due to absolute coincidence. The post is in no way meant to relate to any specific person.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Why girls are not in army?

With 5 more week to ORD, i thought of 5 reasons why girls are not in army. Guys u will learn the 5 lessons we all can bring out of army! Girls may protest against it, while men may not agree with it, but I think it made sense... Enjoy!

Ahh... Interesting topic? Yes indeed. GCE A level had just finished a week ago, the girls are planning on exciting 'shop-till-you-drop' trips to exotic locations like Bangkok, Hong Kong and Taiwan. Their excitement spill over onto the virtual world, with outrageous, 'rub-salt-in-your-wound' status updates on social websites like twitter, facebook and MSN messenger...

Unfortunately, the A level gloomy skies haven't been lifted off the boys. Now they ponder on what National Service has in store for them! The stories they heard from friends, tales told by their proud fathers(although they refuse to go for reservice). Their choice of holiday destionation: Pulau Tekong! WELCOME TO TEKONG! The only place other than prison(excuse the pun) that offers free food, free lodging, personal fitness regime and ridiculously cheap haircuts!


Why girls don't need to protect the country?

Yes it is unfair! Sometimes, life isn't all fair and square! Our lives are not always fair because the earth we live in isn't square(haha)! Well I refuse to be all pessimistic and upset with why girls don't need to don the green uniform like the Singapore men! I CHOOSE to believe this army experience that all men will go through will transform them into a better being, one that is tolerant, patient, capable and matured! It is only to our benefit...

1) Emotional Capacity. it is proven that women are more vulnerable and prone to have emotional attachment than men!

If you ever observed your friends, you would have noticed that women are by far the more emotional specimen of human kind. I honestly cannot imagine girls being confined in camp for 2weeks, not being able to carry mobile phone wherever they go before last parade! They would go crazy. As independent as they can be, women do need companion BIG TIME. That being said, I also believe they will make friends faster than men if they do enlist into the army. They will make friends within the platoon faster than they learn to tie their bootlaces!( Guys, you can now confess how long it took before you warm up to your buddy)

Of course, we are all just mere human beings who are driven by emotions. All attached men who enlisted will know how heavy our hearts felt saying goodbye every Sunday 1900hrs after dinner! The feeling to lay down on your bed, stare into the ceilings, the 'tad..tad..tad..' noise created by the fans... In more severe circumstances, laying inside the very hole you dug, rifle resting on your chest, stars shining brightly in the skies, the flapping of the mosquitoes' wings whistling in your ears periodically... We do miss our girlfriends in the better 'world' out there. The sense of helplessness when she needed someone to talk to, and there is nothing you can do in camp that can make her feel any better. How about the Wednesday nights when she called just to inform you of her mambo plans? If people out there ever think that men are ever secure creatures, they will be amazed at the amount of tears shed going on in the silent hours of the night! :P

Now, imagine what would be the response of women if the officers and sergeant majors scold and shout at them with the most fanciful languages ever created in our MTV generation? Are soldiers going to fall in to be scolded with their rifles or tissue boxes? How many para-counselors is the SAF going to hire if women are enlisted to do National Service? Don't get me wrong, women are not emotionally vulnerable, but the harshness and treatment men endured in army can be deemed as downright 'MEAN' and 'BIATCH' by many women.

#1 Lesson learn from army
Men, accept everything that comes your way. When your commanders scold you, yell at you, punish you...Most of the time, you do not understand it, you do not know why you deserve it, but this patience and tolerance you experienced will be useful in your future relationships! The next time you quarrel with your girlfriend,you probably do not understand why she is so upset over trivial matters, why you deserved the cold treatment, but instead of making matters worse, you would have learn to accept things first(until things get better), before explaining yourself to her!! a.k.a Do push-up FIRST,talk to Sir in his cubicle LATER. Listen to what your girlfriend has to say, explain to her later :)

Monday, October 12, 2009

Build your kingdom

Have you wondered why human loves to fantasize about having connections with the royal blood in them? Men like to be called a king/prince? For example,Price Charming? Why then do girls like to be referred to as princesses? I suspect this actually has to do with how we see ourselves! Search and observe deep within yourself, and you will find out that we actually have our very own 'protected realm' in our soul that we subconsciously preserve, protect and guard very closely! I believe that is the mini 'kingdom' that we have in our personal lives.


As much as our world has evolved with technology, this little 'kingdom' within us is actually as ancient as it can be! Yes, it must have been like those that has high walls and only one entry-exit point because it is so well protected and covered that our friends wouldn't know,and we at times wouldn't know ourselves!

kingdom is defined in dictionary.com as 1. A state or government having a king or queen as its head. 2.Anything conceived as constituting a realm or sphere of independent action or control and influence.

The things we do keep in this 'kingdom' are in fact the ones that we control and protect. Believe it or not, our life can actually be centered around this little 'kingdom' of ours! It definitely has the ability to engineer the thoughts you think and the actions you do! Like the definition of the word, whatever is in your 'kingdom' has the ability to influence and control the actions and outcome in your life. Now, what are you building in this 'kingdom' of yours?

1) Money. This is very common among many people! The fact is-We need money to survive on this earth. It is in fact such a powerful tool that I think money is the closest thing to be the currency of love! When you love someone, you lavish the person with gifts. I have yet to know of anyone of giving gifts(let alone costly ones) because he doesn't like that particular person. A parent supports a child financially for his studies and living because they love the child! They believe in the child, love them and want to see the child have a future.

Unfortunately, the same way how money can buy attachment to your emotions,the same way money can 'buy' your ethics. More often than not, people never get satisfied with what they have, and they get greedy! We never hear of people saying 'Enough' to their businesses, discouraging customers to pay them money for the goods they sell! In fact, the bigger the company, the more they will charge you! Your Creative music player may cost you S$200,but apple cost you $500 for their ipods. Apple is the second richest in the Rich-list now, but do they need to charge so much?Don't they have ENOUGH money already? No, because they want more, they need more to invest in R&D and come up with new products to make them RICHER.

This mechanism of self dissatisfaction is exactly the one that ignite cases of corruptions,cheating and robbing all over the world. If money is indeed this 'kingdom' that you cherish in your life, be careful not to allow money to control your life. Subconsciously, it may even be your priority, without you knowing that you compromise all other good things in life like ethics and friendships! You are to control your possession, not the other way around!


2)Philosophies and beliefs. It is somewhat important that we have these to be part of our mini 'kingdoms'. Everyone of us has a set of beliefs and 'rules' that we abide to. It might be in the form of your religion, or it might be a set of beliefs that you are brought up with in your living environment. Whatever they are, LIVE BY IT! No religion will teach their devotees to kill, cheat or lie! Likewise, no parents would teach their child to rape, kill or rebel.

However, I feel that there need to be a balance if this is in your 'kingdom'. Too much of this and people will see you as 'freaky' and definitely unapproachable, but none of these and your life will seem directionless and there is no moral compass for your soul! Somehow, I personally believe philosophies and beliefs are important because they are the one that gives you a hope and a future. When we look ahead, there really isn't anything that is for certain,and though it may not be obvious,it is our beliefs and philosophies in life that give us a sense of hope.

For example,take a man who knows the future requires him to overcome numerous obstacles. His philosophy in life is: A champion is not one who never fails, but one who never quits. His mind will immediately give him that sense of hope, and his fear of failure will probably not be as magnified as before!!


3)Your lifestyle. I think this is the most common one! How you live your life, it is how it will unfold for you! Gandhi once said 'You are made of your thoughts. If you think of IT, you will become IT!' Isn't this the case in our society? A child with a broken family(without any psychological/emotional assistance) will grow up having resentment towards love and marriage. A person who failed miserably in school/work, made worse with the criticism he received from peers will feel really lousy about himself in the future. These people has inevitably put the negativity of their past and circumstances into their little 'kingdoms'!

It is sad because the next time they are faced with a situation and they dig within their 'kingdom' and see their 'armour of shame', they have lost the war before even fighting a battle! Never build a kingdom of failures!! Pick up the sword and the shield and fight that battle like how a true warrior king will fight!

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I believe there are many other things that may occupy your mini 'kingdom' but I shared these three because they are very true in my own personal life! I would not want to say which is the best,and which is the one that truly should have the priority and right in our 'kingdom'. This is a personal choice each one of us has to make, because you are the king of your OWN 'kingdom'.


As for me,I believe a life need to be balanced. All three will inevitably play a major role in my life and my future, but it is important to keep check that I do not go to their extremes! I believe we will all be good rulers of our 'kingdom' that our lives will be lives with destiny and purpose! :)

Friday, October 2, 2009

Raymond for Miss World please! :)

I found out this post had been sitting in the draft for ages! Well, you have heard about the incident and how she literally made herself so popular(not by reality show, but by a PAGEANT), and how she single handedly created her own dictionary that would put Oxford, and 'cOxford' to shame! If you still don't know what I am talking about, this is her:


As much I thought this was ridiculous, some things still puzzled me!! She is an educated girl, and we all know these beauty queens have this aura that exudes composure and confidence! Why did she speak in that manner? Did she forget that she was on camera and that the tape is rolling? Probably not. After all, the interviewer stuck that long pipe-like microphone into her face!

1) Singaporeans are too critical about our representatives? It is part of our DNA to be 'kaypoh'! Miss Low won the pageant among many other girls, and regardless of what was in the video, I'm sure there was a Q&A segment in the competition that accumulated to her overall score that brought her the victory! The way I see it, the incident just made a mockery out of the competition's judging panel, the participants of this year's competition and the whole branding of 'Miss World'.

On the other hand, let's give credit where credits are due. It is definitely not easy walking on stage in bikini for all to see, answering questions that don't seem to make sense and smiling throughout the whole show(sometimes I wonder if they needed jaw surgery after the show)! People commented on Rachel Kum's Orchid gown that was designed by a local designer not too long ago. Rachel has Miss Low to thank because her English brought all the juicy zappers of media upon herself! No wonder parents and girls will think twice about going for such auditions! Will you want to join a pageant and risk weathering a media 'tsunami' bombardment that comes wave after wave? I'm not defending anyone, but Singapore actually has its fair share of pretty girls(If guys say Singaporean girls are 'CMI', notice their eyes the next time they go Orchard)! Give these models a break. Allow them to live their dreams, while we seat back and appreciate God's creations.

2) Who is the superficial one? Models are often categorized to be pretty human beings that God might have forgotten to install the brains in them a.k.a bimbos. It is quite sad that these people are associated with terms like shallow, materialistic, empty vase, dumb and the list goes on. Their looks are God-given! I believe they didn't choose their genes, and they definitely didn't pray to look good so that people will look down on them! In fact, many of us want to look half as good-looking as them!

Who are we to judge who these people are? Are we going to judge a young teenager(19 years old) whether she is worthy of representing Singapore just because of her English? The whole idea of the video is supposed to be candid and casual, after all, it was meant for RazorTV( an equivalent to youtube). And come on... When she represent Singapore on the international stage, she will just be answering one Q&A question. I highly doubt they will do candid behind the scene interview for a girl who is from a small sunny island called Singapore, would they? In case you didn't know how worthy a winner she is, these are a few of her other titles prior to Miss World Singapore 2009 from wikipedia:

  • Miss Community Ambassadress 2009
  • Miss Lumiere Ambassadress 2009
  • Miss Best Dressed 2009
  • Miss Dazzling Eyes 2009
  • Miss Photogenic 2009
  • Miss Crowning Glory 2009
  • Miss Best in Catwalk 2009

This girl is a community ambassadress, knows how to dress, has the eyes, has the face and smile for cameras, has the GLORY, and knows how to catwalk... And people are judging her and saying she is not worthy of representing Singapore? WHAT ARE WE THINKING! If I were her grass root leader, I will recommend that pageants in Singapore has a new prize category called the 'Miss Best English' in the upcoming parliament meeting!

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All said and done, she gave up her crown after the credit card fraud incident. I really hope we will not be a bunch of people that smashes the dreams of our friends! There are things that are unacceptable... But to criticize someone for her English? Somehow, I am thankful she got caught for her credit card fraud and that she gave up her title. After all, how much confidence do you think she will have left if she continue to go for Miss World pageant representing Singapore, knowing her supporters ridiculed her back home?

To all aspiring models and pageant contestants, my number one advice- Try not to open your mouth, only one question and the following should ALWAYS be your ONLY answer:

' I want to win because I believe in World peace, sharing the love and hope that everyone deserves. Of course, World peace will not happen if we do not first conserve our World! I will do my utmost to promote environmental friendly campaigns! Lastly, I will stand up for the women rights because I believe they are the unsung heroes in our society that mould the young minds of the future generations. Thank you!' *Exit with a beaming smile*

Monday, September 21, 2009

Things you didn't know about your decisions!

If human thin-slice everything they see, wouldn't that make our world a cake? hmm...

Our mind is a powerful organ that God has given to every single one of us. It determines the outcomes in your lives, and it is the organ that organize, analysis every situation and the course of action we will take. It even determines your emotions! Your heart will love a person, but it is your mind that tells you that a certain someone is attractive.

I am reading this book called 'BLINK' by Malcolm Gladwell! I think it generally talks about how human can decide in an instance with their subconscious mind. That is also where the word 'thin slicing' comes about. Wikipedia describes the term as: Our ability to gauge what is really important from a very narrow period of experience a.k.a spontaneous decisions. I'm not too sure but I think it is like making a decision based on first impression. The scary thing about it is that it is happening all around you ALL THE TIME! :S


It is fascinating how a mind works! Answer this question:

A father drove his son to school. They met in a fatal car accident. The father died, while the son suffered serious injuries. He was brought to the hospital A&E! Upon arrival, the doctor looked at the boy and said, 'That is my son'! Now,who on earth is the doctor?

This is not the father. This is Malcolm Gladwell, the author.

Initially I thought it is the step-father. But well, the doctor is the mother! Isn't it funny how we associate doctors to be men and not women? Call it favoritism but because of the environment we live in, the social influences in our lives, our minds have already predetermined for us that doctors are male. It is the same how in America, people see the Africans or Mexicans to be inferior to the whites! The same in Asia. We are accustomed to the fact that maids are either Indonesians or Filipino. Would you have believed if the housekeeper of a typical family is a Chinese or Caucasian? There can be instances, but they are rare.

From the quiz above, your mind has subconsciously thin-slice the idea that doctors should not be female, and that domestic workers should be Africans, Mexicans, Indonesians or Filipino. The ability of thin slicing can be useful and efficient when it comes to decisions that require instant decisions and little time for considerations, but I think it can be harmful in some instances as well. Let me share my thoughts on this book:

1) What impressions are we giving to others? It is believed that the outcome of an interview is decided in the 3minutes you entered the room. That is why we dress up for an interview! Did you know that of the CEO of the Fortune 500 list, the average male CEOs are just under 6 feet tall?Whether we like it or not, first impression counts for almost everything. Gladwell talked about how people can tell a person's characteristic from facial expressions almost immediately! Isn't that very true? In the movies, when a man tells the actress 'I love you', she is ALWAYS look at him in the eyes. Why? It is because his facial expression will show his sincerity! Likewise, when you shake a person's hand and he/she looks down while introducing himself, you can tell that he has very little self esteem!

It is frightening to think that people thin slice the moment they see you! The way you carry yourself, the way you speak and behave in front of others! What impression do you want to give to others? An image that you don't take things seriously and cannot be taken seriously? Or are you being seen as someone who is snobbish and stuck up?

2) How do we see others? Now that I shared how we should give a good impression on others, how are YOU judging and thin slicing others? Let's admit it! On the first day of school,when nobody knows nobody... A bespectacled, pimply, short boy with buck tooth, hands full of notes and book walk along the corridor. What immediately come to your mind? NERD? Yes. As much as we want to be a nice person, our minds have subconsciously decided on how we classify the person!

My reflection on this is it may be decisive to tell of a person who may have bad intentions, but this ability to judge others subconsciously can actually be to our disadvantage. Take a person who does sales at the nearby mall. Do you realize that if you dress up( long sleeve and pants), you are more likely to be approached than when you are in your berms and tee? Well, if you are doing business, are you quick to judge a customer? If a customer walks into your car/flat showroom in berms and singlet, are you going to disqualify him of being a potential customer? Gladwell shared his experiment of this car showroom in America. It is proven that there is a higher chance of an employee attending to a customer if he is white compared to a black. Isn't that depressing? Never judge and classify your customers. You will never know when a walk-in will be your potential customer. In fact, most of the time, the only thing that stops a customer/walk-in from 'window shopping' and 'shop hopping' is the service and attitude of the workers!

3) Thin Slicing is not the ONLY solution. If you haven't realized by now, every book will only support its own thesis( They are not your GP essays)! Obviously, Gladwell promoted his idea of thin-slicing. On numerous occasions, i was almost carried away with the idea that maybe, JUST maybe, the best solutions and decisions we will make is when the processing is done in an instance, when we thin slice! Yes it is true that having too much data and information can disrupt you from the main focus of the situation and the 'extra' factors thrown into the equation when making a decision may end up with you making an inaccurate decision. However, thin slicing CANNOT be done all he time!

How do you thin slice your marriage partner? Will you know her family background from the way she dress? Will you from her financial status know whether she lives in a happy family? How do you thin slice the future path that you will take? What does each university, each course has to offer from looking at the internet? We live in a world where our decisions will bring about our consequences, and sometimes there are decisions that we cannot just thin slice simply because the consequence is too great!

If you read the book, Gladwell started with the story of how some people can tell if the statue is fake the moment they looked at the fingers etc. Well, I guess that story says it all. As much as thin slicing can be accurate, the museum sent the statue around the world for different people's perspectives. That alone is gathering more knowledge and not merely deciding due to a person's instinct and thin slice.


Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Friendships and their farewells!

It is kind of funny that people around me started to leave! No, they are not leaving me, how can they bear to do that? It started with 2LT(NS) Ng Jing Song who flew off to Duke for his scholarship, followed by my sergeants in my platoon who ORD, followed by Miss Cicilia from my church cell group. All of them are great people who really impacted my life in one way or another.

I need to share with you the logic of 'ice kachang'! When I look back and think of them, it is a mixed feeling you know? Something you can associate with ice kachang! I am sad because they would leave and our level of communication would decrease(the beans in ice kachang! YUCKS) and we will somehow inevitably distant. I'm sure it is the same for any of your friendships as well! Yet at the same time, I am happy because it is for their better(the ice and syrup!).

I learn that friendships are built on communication. Rightly so. Look at your secondary school buddies. You spent all the days' recess with them, yet after that when you go your separate ways, suddenly these buddies just disappear. They have their own friends, you have your own friends. I always complain to my friends that the friends you spend time with keep changing. It seem to me that it is decided by the phase of life you are in!

Let's face it, it is always easier to make friends! As long as you blend initiative and courage together, you would have already made a new friend. With platforms like twitter, blog and facebook, it is even easier to make friends that are only a few 'clicks' away! For all the convenience of doing a two-way introduction, maintaining a friendship is never easy! Effort, time and money are needed to catch up or follow on your friends' lives. People really don't care how much you know until they know how much you care!

It is saddening to see my friends leave, at times even difficult to accept! Let me share with you what goes through my mind to help me accept the fact that they are moving on:

1) Look back and be thankful. I honestly believe that the only way to stop a person to want more is to look back and appreciate what one has. If it is the same concept with finance,health etc, then it is the same for friendships. Look back and be thankful for having the opportunity to know the person. I am very sure there will be great memories that you can fondly remember!

Jing Song is a gentleman that is more than a friend. He is like a brother. I knew him since primary school, but we only got to know one another in a more personal way in OCS. You asked me what we have been through? We walked 72km together, we wore our long smelly uniform with our faces camo-ed together. We got drunk together during our officer induction programme, although it was our first times. These memories are memories I will remember, and I'm sure they are forever! :)

2) Let it be THE litmus test. A true friend is a friend that is tested. I am not saying we go around testing our friendships, but you will know who are your true friends only after they move on in whatever they do! Despite the fact that communication is minimised, a true friend will put in the effort to keep in touch! It is definitely easier said than done. Will you want to sacrifice your time and effort to meet up with someone you 'cut' communications with 2 years ago, bearing in mind you might not have anything to converse about when you meet??!!

I try my best to keep in contact with my friends whom I haven't meet in the longest of time. My advice is to immediately contact them when your friend left/moved on. Trust me... Most of the time, moving on to something new, somewhere of the unknown can be scary and it is definitely something that is out of their comfort zone. If there is one time they need people by their side, it is when they are trying to settle down. Be the friend who put your arm around, brighten their day with a smile or an ear when they are lonely!

3) They are moving on to do something greatER! I am very sure people decide to move on because they know the new place will offer them to be and to do something greater in their lives. Being a former geography student, let us look at migration! People move to another new place because they know/believe that they will have a higher standard of living in the new location! A nomad will not move to a location that lacks in water and shelter! I know this is the toughest to do, but it is the most true! Instead of feeling sad, be happy for your friend because there are greater challenges, greater obstacles that they will do AND conquer!

This is so true! Jing Song will go to Duke to study and I'm ever so certain that he will come back and change the way the country is governed! My sergeants will go into the civilian world to boost the Singapore economy and Cicilia will one day be a cell group leader herself! Am I sad to see them leave? YES. Am I happy to know that they are going to be someone better in the future? YES. So how? Again, my 'ICE Kachang' logic!

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It is fair for me to say that friendship is like a book! For every beginning there will always be an ending! Of course I am not saying that all friendships will come to an end. It is true that every chapter of a person's life will come to an end, but the story of the friendship can continue regardless of which chapter of your life you are in. The thing is YOU decide whether there will be a continuity. You are the author of your own friendships! You decide whether your friendship will be a one-book wonder or will it come in a series? I believe that with hardworking and sacrifices... Just like all serial books, the new series and the new story of your friendship in a new chapter of your life will be more fun, fulfilling, better and stronger than the ones before!

To those I mentioned above, I pray that what I reflected this week on friendships and their farewell will come true in our friendships!

For your information, this was the first time i made a video! It was for Cicilia's farewell! Enjoy it.